Most artists have sketchbooks, but I don't draw. Therefore, I call mine a notebook. In fact, I am not good at drawing. When we need to present drawings, Roger does drawings. He always makes fun of how I draw. I doodle with no sense of scale or perspective. After years of working with me, Roger is getting really good at interpreting my doodles.
I put down more words than doodles in my notebook. When I read something that hit home, I put it my notebook so I can remember.
During my grieving over the loss of my mom, I found comfort in reading about grief and death. Below is from Anne Lammott:
"You will lose someone you can't live without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn't seal back up. And you come through. It's like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly- that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp."
Losing mom was different from losing my dad 10 years prior, equally painful, but different. I was lucky to have close relationships with the both of them even though I lived on the other side of the globe. A friend said to me: " You are an adult orphan now." I didn't know such term exists. I just feel those two words can't be more accurate to describe how I feel.